Thumb rule....!

What do u think is true for friendship that is also true for love? We all know for a fact that friendship sows the seed of love. I clearly have one rule in my mind which i have followed since childhood. "if the girl likes u in one go for something then she will like u no matter what u do ( even if u have pissed her off for something). And if she does not like you in the first go then, no matter how hard anyone tries she will not like u.... "

It is important to see whether the girl has an inclination towards the conversation u make with her. If the input is flowing from just one side then the relation MAY not grow for long. I had thoroughly understood this when I apporached my puberty. So i used to always let go off women who were not showing any interest in me or my conversations, despite i having a soft corner for them.
Conversely, there were loads of instances where i never used to let go off a FRIEND even after i had understood that the lady is showing the least of interest in me or my conversations. i kept pursuing the relation. I was just wanting friendship. Nothing more. Why cant women just be friends and not think beyond. I started getting unhappy despite knowing very well that i had done nothing to spoil the relation. Then why was i subjected to such a treatment? Today, after so many years have passed by, Eureka moment arrived. The rule of thumb that i used to follow for LOVE should have also been followed for FRIENDSHIP too...may be thn i wud have felt less hurt. It was useless pursuing women who were just trying to waste time for the heck of it and making myself unhappy thinking things would improve. Instead its now easier to let go off such people.

It may be hard in the beginning (thats what i realise) but once in the gear, i am sure it will be a smooth ride. Its better to invest myself in a place where i feel happy rather than pursue people who are dis-inteterested in me (as such wthout knowing the real intentions of me).

The on and off button...!

Some one once said to me....i turn my self on and off as and when the situation or the scene changes.....How much so ever i may be tired, i just turn that part of me off and then ADAPT accordingly to turn the switch ON in me to gel with the happy and joyous group/ situation. I feel its SO TRUE but equally so difficult to be able to do it with ease. i have been trying to do it, but unfortunately with little success. i try not put up a part of me in a situation which demands things out of my skin....but then, things dont come so easy in life, or do they...? we have to do things which wil make our life a little approachable to others...!!! since the last few days the dilemma of trying to put up that i am not has been devastating and it showed on my health...But its better to take a few blows than give up without trying...

I strongly believe that being able to adapt to a new situation does change yor frame of mind too... how much ever depressed we may be the change of scenario and thereby the change in vibes does tend to relax the mind...!!! so a conscious effort shud be given to change the situation as and when it arrives...not trying to run away from it but rather trying to divert for a little while..!

so the next time you are turned off by something.....try and turn on the happy switch on in you by simply changing the situation/place/activity or may be company of unwanted friends.....!!!

Indian women are tough

Men by nature are less emotional than women. And when there is a death in a family they are relatively less disturbed at this time as they stay busy in the activities and remain distracted from the pain. But ladies, being emotional, burst open in tears whenever someone visits to show the respect for the dead. After the demise the last rights of the dead (in an Indian family) run till days. During this period she is frequently visited by guests and suffers through hell remembering the dead repeatedly. She toughens up from within and starts to survive the visits of grief-stricken guests . She goes through it, but now more poised. And to do that she becomes stronger and tougher. She weeps within over the loss without loosing her decorum and not letting get anyone affected in the family. This helps the family to recover from the loss sooner than later.

I am not very sure if any woman across the world can take the loss of a person more sedately than an indian woman. People of other cultures across the world who are not used to the frequent visits of sorrowing guests would not be able to understand the anguish of going through the loss over and again. Wrong are those people who say that indian women are timid and very feeble. A soul who has overcomed such a huge loss can never be called that.

I salute to the steely nerves of Indian women who show character even in difficult times...!

Why do we pray...?

When someone falls sick we just start praying. All elders say that praying will improve a person’s health. I used to wonder how. How will someone’s health improve by my prayers? Elders say that there exists a health account to which we should keep adding good fortune by praying or chanting. I used to agitate that how does good fortune come from praying/ chanting? I then came across the theory of cause and effect, which said do something (cause) to gain something (effect). That doing something is nothing but praying or chanting and gaining something is nothing but gaining good health. When a person falls sick, his health karma is low. It means we have to add something to his health account to help it improve its value and thereby the person’s health. We cannot add health. What do we add then? This improvement in the balance of health account comes collectively when we all pray for that person’s speedy recovery. So we are making a cause (praying) to see an effect (improvement of health). Had we not prayed; may be his health karma would deteriorate further and would have lead to dire consequences. It is said correctly, our life is heavily influenced by the “cause and the effect theory”. Examples are
· You should sow hard work to reap benefits.
· Every action has an opposite and equal reaction.
· The boomerang once thrown will return back.
· Only if you give yourself a chance only then will you have a chance to win.
Cause made will show its effect. All the above statements have a common thread. That is cause and effect. So the next time we fall in a difficult situation we now know what to do.
PRAY/CHANT.

When it strikes back

Thinking about the boomerang effect, i keep thinking to myself whether i will be able to survive its return or not?

I was preparing a small survey at my office and thought of sharing it with my HR about a small petty issue. I thought my effort would be appreciated as no one had ever done such a thing before. As u know sometimes the things dont go theway you have planned. The plan backfired and instead of me accepting the accolades i was gifted with stingy comments. The trouble was that i was not supposed to do such a survey, as per the laws of the company. i understood the criticalities of the comments and accepted that i should'nt have done it. The whole idea was to improve and contribute to the system. Unfortunately, the improvement may have caused more harm than good if my plan was to be implemented.

However the best that i could get out of it is that If i had not started the survey i would'nt have understood about the seriousness of such a thing, the way it was explained to me. its better to do something and see the response and there by understand/learn the system than just letting time teach you. I guess even if my plan did not work out i still walk away with an experience which might help me in the future.



Thank god i did not fall into a soup just because of my adventerous behaviour.

Controversies love me...!!!

Scenario 1: Im about to change my cell phone. I demand my then good friend to accompany me. She says yes. I also ask another friend of mine to accompany me. She said that she was busy. i said that it was fine if she could not make it. I go out with this friend of mine. I finish up my shopping. I return home to call her in the night. She does not pick my call. I keep trying. She does not budge. And then finally when she did, I asked her as to what was on her mind.
Misunderstanding:She tells me that she was pissed that I was ORDERING her to come along and that i was ASKING politely to the other one. She felt insulted.
My stand: When I am more free with a person I dont ASK I simply ORDER/DEMAND. I guess she was not able to understand that I was a better friend with her rather than the other one. Lesson learnt: Women get involved with petty details and miss the important point.

Scenario 2: I put up my pictures on ORKUT. Co-incidentally it has pictures of my group members. They do not want to be seen on the open/public forum. Agreed. What about the common pics then. Im left stranded. I still put up the pics. Bang come in the sharp worded replies.
Misunderstanding: I dont understand as to what needs to go online in an open website.
My Stand: Why should I feel confined because of others thoughts. I continued using the website with more zeal, crushing all the apprehensions i had about the pictures to be put up next.
Lesson Learnt: Put up your solo pics. Damn the world...!!!

Scenario 3: I am a talkative person. Expressive of my opinion. With utmost enthusiasm to face challenges.
Misunderstanding: I dont work at office. I'm too airy. Blabbers a lot with girls when instead I should be working.
My stand: Give me work and then observe my contribution. If I am kept out of work then how will you be able to gauge my performance without having seen my work?
Lesson Learnt: Simply go underground when you pick up that you are making rounds of the gossip mills at the work place. Out of sight means out of mind. It works the best.

Scenario 4: My online friend (not from hyderabad) receives a call for a new job in hyderabad. I haven't met her in my life. She asks for my opinion on the call for the job. She has been offered a 6 month project and with a pay of just 10K without the guarantee that she would be offered a job there after. she is unhappy and is confused as to what to do? I give in my opinion that she should take up the project. She refutes that why should she take it up if it will barely be able to keep her floating in a place so far away.
Misunderstanding: I want to meet her, hence the opinion.
My stand: The industry which we come from pays little to the freshers. And the project which she has been offered was good enough for a time span of 6 months. Post which she could get a handsome package near her home in one of the better companies.
Lesson Learnt: People like to hear what they feel is right, even if they are not.

Scenario 5: I like helping friends whenever possible and when the help would not trouble me much. I give in my 100% in a relation where i believe that it is worth it and then standby it even if the whole world says that the relation/person is wrong. I have faith in my friends.
Misunderstanding: I am overdoing things very much early in the relation.
My Stand: Life is short. Live it. Give in your energy, time and money in a relation which u feel is worth putting in asap.
Lesson Learnt: People will never understand my nature; that this is the way i am. And the help that i offer is just for MY happiness. Helping someone makes me happy. There is no need expaining why i offered the help.

Scenario 6: I HAD a best friend. She was my confession box. I used to treat her as my true compatriot in my life. I never had any physical inclination towards her.
Misunderstanding: I keep taking chances on her.
My Stand: When I am so clear that she is no more than a great friend, then the question of taking chances with her never rise.
Lesson Learnt: I have to let go of a friend whom i thought would be a great company and would support me till my death. There is no point holding on to a person who has suspicion running all the time on her mind for a person who never had any physical inclination towards her.

Scenario 7: I am the only child of my parents.
Misunderstanding: I must be a spoilt brat who has been raised with a silver spoon in my mouth.
My stand: I come from a middle class family. My mom and dad used to given in to my demands only if they felt that fullfilling the demand would work in my favor. I was kept out of things which would not help me even if i cried and yelled. I was never given things before the right time arrived.
Lesson Learnt: It helped me understand their importance in my life and made me use them rather than misuse them. Today I am happy and i treasure my upbringing and thank my parents for making me the person that i am and instilling in me such values.

These are just a few to name of the many that i face evryday. I dont bother about them any more, even if it is making me write this blog. The only thing that i want to say is that different people think differently. If we can strike a chord with someone then the relationship flourishes and if not then we know its fate. Expression is such a beautiful trait of humans. why dont we use it? Misunderstandings will all diminish if we speak our mind, but instead we EXPECT the other person to realise and understand things. It may so happen that people are not able to comprehend these SUBTLE signs. I am a dumb ass in things such as these. So if my friends know me then they know that its better to tell me straight. But there is always room to improve. I am learning to REALISE these subtle scenarios. Scenarios if not clarified may lead to a huge MISUNDERSTANDING in the future.

A true Loner...!!!

Yeah that’s right. Finally I have said it. A true loner that’s what I am. You must be looking down on me with sympathy but trust me I have had some good times. Instead of being with one woman, its better to be out with many. What say? LOL..!! Many potential female friends are better off to choose from rather than get stuck with a big mistake. That’s what I call them. Lol.

Loners have their own share of happiness.
· I have been out watching a movie alone. No need begging friends to come out and watch a movie which they have either seen or are not interested in.
· I have been out riding my dear bike alone on the streets. Not caring where I’m going. Just enjoying the breeze when I want. Not answerable to anyone. Just doing what my heart is saying.
· Returning home when I want. This has been the best gift of a loner. No responsibilities such as giving time to someone when I can’t or don’t want to.
· Eating food alone when I can. Enjoying the food where I want and which kind I want. Defying the statement time and again that "I just can't eat alone". FO who make such statements, loosers.
· Cleaning up my home by myself.
· Shopping for gifts.
No interference.....(thats the cherry on the cake) of any one in my lifestyle. Lived my bachelor's life to the fullest. All these things (to name a few of many) that I have done; have a taken a huge effort from me and have now started to turn around on me and have stopped disturbing me.

I have come to realization that after 26 yrs being single I just can’t adjust so quickly with some one intimately. I tried being with a girl. Damn, the relationship lasted only a month. Lol. Poor girl, she was with me...!!! Who would have thought that I would have given up on it so soon. Never mind.

I have reached a point where every one is trying to tell me that I should get married asap to escape the boredom of being alone. But honestly its not the single hood that’s troubling me, its rather the solitary that’s hurting me more. Not being able to enjoy/live my life the way I want is like succumbing to the situation. I'm a go-getter, making things happen for me. That’s in my blood. However this city has hardly given me that share of fun. But I still don’t loose heart. I always look towards being friends with girls and never push the boundaries of friendship. I enjoy friendship more than a close relationship. I believe, the difficult person that I am to be with, no girl would want to be with me. Lol. And the girl who would come in my life is sure gonna be an angel who can bear me (literally). That is what will separate her from all. And I know when she is here I will never let go of her ever. So, my angel if you are listening I can’t wait longer. However, the dumb person that I am in such things, I really dont know whether I will be able to know/figure out that she is the one. So till I find her I guess I'm happy ogling at beautiful women...

I guess thats what Loners do...!!!

:-)

I'm Learning...!!!

Why am i feeling this way today??? Whats going on in my life. I thought of putting my cell phone off to shut myself out from all. But cant do that as my cell phone is connected to the office telephone board for emergencies. damn..!!! I cant run away either. Loads of things on my head at the moment. I'm listening to my only true friend. My music. But its not helping me either. What is bothering me? I cant really understand. My exams are on my head. Is that the real cause?That is not that I am worried about or thinking about today. Then...???? I have friends from all over India. My phone bills are soaring. But I'm still calling them to seek a piece of happiness. But it is still not making me happy today. I call them as I feel like talking to them. But they don't reciprocate the way I want them to. But I get utterly disturbed if they do not return the call or for that matter when they do not call by themselves. Is it that they are not intrested in being friends with me? Or am i with the wrong people? Or is it the wrong timing? Or is it the nature of me thats causing them to do so. I guess all the three contribute in my case. I'm learning not to get disturbed if they dont call. Im learning not to worry if I dont return a call. But my nature does not allow me to just leave them or stop calling because they don't call. My conscience is not allowing me to do so. Because its not me! However, its time to revive the resolution that I had kept at the beginning of this year. Its time to shed some unwanted friends...!!!! Its a good adage "Sometimes its good to let go" As, "these friends" are so much involved in their lives that they hardly will bother if I dont call them or if I forget them. I'm "learning" not to get disturbed when they dont reciprocate. Thats one part over. Decided.

But what about today? I feel like shutting my self up and going "underground" for sometime. May be that will help me get my solace. What does all this mean. All I want to do today is to relax like the old times. I just want to leave aside all the worries and the formalities and shed the skin of a "banavati" me. I want to be me today. The way i used to enjoy with my pals in mumbai without any thoughts that who is thinking what of whom. Just enjoying the moments with them. Not thinking whether its a girl or a boy or what should I be talking or doing keeping in mind the gender. I just want to enjoy the way I want to. I want some genuine friends around me who are like me and enjoy like me. But my situation is not helping me at all. All the people at office dont do things that i like doing. The place where i spend one third of my day. So, I guess its the curse of growing old that I have to "behave like an adult" or "be mature" ALL the time. The good times can't be with me forever. I can't be the way I was then ALWAYS. But I'm learning. I'm learning to stop bothering them who cant accept me the way that I am ...!!!! And also learning to stop bothering myself if I happen to LOOSE them. I guess, its my way or the highway.
Fin.

I was so wrong about him..!!

I'm not gay....let me clear that first...dont get me wrong there..!!! Its about my close friend's dad. And the friend that im talking is from a gujju family, abt 28 yrs in age today, unmarried. She has been looking for a match for about 4 years now. However whenever I hear from her she is still looking for one. I was kinda cool about the whole thing initially, but after a few instances I started feeling that she was pushing it too much and rejecting all the poor chaps which she came across as the "prospectives". After enrollments at lots of matrimonial community centres, online matrimonial websites she still is single. Growing up with a staunch gujju upbringing she grew up in a relatively (I have my reasons) conservative family and she was not allowed with us to most of the late night outings. She had to be home by 9 pm in the evening. However, she never complained about it. But she used to keep refering that she used to have fights with her dad over petty issues here and there and feel irritated at times...thats just for the back ground.

After 4 years of "looking" for a match I feel she is kinda loosing intrest in the institution of marriage (God help her...!!) and a few days back when i was thinking about her it suddenly striked me that in a gujju family where the girls are married off at a very tender age, her father has stood by her daughter, irrespective what issues he has with her, in allowing her to take all the time required to take the right decision of her life and not forcing her to get married to a person whom she will not love in the future. Suddenly the person whom i used to not appreciate (with due respect), for not allowing my friend to be with us when we used to have all the masti and dhamaal, suddenly grew in respect in my view. He suddenly became a hero from nothing more than zero (with due respect). I used to always say to myself that how can a parent not want his child to be happy. I guess he was waiting for the right opportunity and situation to show his never ending love and support for his daughter.

Its not necessary to go out to prove our love to someone by showing it, sometimes silent support also speaks volume. Lesson learnt.

I'm mature.....I THINK...!!!

What is maturity? Maturity as per me is the ability to behave and react as per the situation. The situation may call upon for seriousness and sometimes the opposite. We just cant be serious all the time. thats just not us. I choose to be me when I'm around my friends. I drop all guards and enjoy my moments with them. However when a serious situation crops up, when I am with them, I sometimes find it difficult to transit from the ME to the person required. May be this is maturity...!!! To move out from a personality that we are to a personality that is required by the moment. What if the person is not able to able to see the requirement. All people are not GYAANIs...!!! Some are dumb and some are MATURE....damn. The same word again... It sometimes gets so difficult to decipher the situation that it gets overwhelming and intimidating. The reasons could be many. May be we havent been in any similar such situation before, or we show disintrest in the situation, or we dont want to get involved in the situation as there are many other things on our head and many more. The list is endless. Then what do we do? hmm...thats what has been troubling me. My mentor once told me, "take as much responsibilty as you can. dont worry about the people around, even if they are negative". I strongly follow it. The act of doing a task responsibily may get us into the mode where we are stepping out of our skin (and start being a person that we are not in reality) to prove our worth and deliver the goods. I believe, it has got more to do with the mental attitude. What you feel for the situation. If we are deeply connected with the situation we understand the situation better and behave more maturely.
So I guess to be more mature I need to be a person that may be i am not or dont want to be???? May be I need to understand the criticality of the situation quickly even if i am not capable of it. Be cautious of my words that i utter even if i am a blabber mouth...thats like pushing yourself to the limit. The limit of our personality...!!!!
So i guess mathematically,

Maturity = f(situation, experience of a person in such a situation, person's mental attitude , person's ability to decipher and adapt quickly to the situation)

With the mantra as above i guess i am on my way to being more mature....




NAAAH...!!! maturity comes with age, but definitely these factors will help in sometime....!!!!

Long distance....a dilemma...??

Hmm.. I'm lookin at my life and I wonder that how many friends do I have who are far away but I still make calls to these friends of mine. In the initial days when I used to call them up, I used to get deeply involved in the most minute detals of their lives. Then I came across a girl (who so far away) took away my heart. Hmmm...!!! must say a perfect thief (Junior Big B is the influence here)... never mind...!!!

In the initial period of my kinship with her the distance worked on my side. How? You would be wondering...!!! Picture this. You like a girl and you are getting the vibes that the girl is also intrested. The girl is excited to talk to you and the vice-versa inspite of the huge STD bills and the little night sleep. You grow closer to the girl. The distance worked for you because you are so far away from the girl that she is hardly worried that she is talkin to a stranger (may be) whom she hasnt met (or met at the most once). She has nothing to lose from this relation...as the emotional attachment is minimum, the guy will pay for the bills (most of the times and the girl enjoys....[:(] never mind) and may be the immediate trouble/situation of meeting a stranger/new person is averted for atleast some more time as you are in a different city. And voila...!!! the relation has flourished.

After a few months, You finally make up your mind to make the next move. You want to meet the girl. The girl too is excited to be bold and ready to meet a stranger aka now a GOOD friend. You guys meet up. Sparks fly. You come back home with the promise to return and meet her soon. Few more months pass by. The reality sinks in. The bills sore, you both now start to catch up on your lives, meet new people. You start showing disintrest in each other slowly. The "love and excitement" fades off. And who is to blame here....(I guess) the long distance...!!

You think to yourself, " Long distance relationships never work...!!!"

Damn you've changed sides. the distance which earlier worked for you has now started to work against you. You think to yourself, may be if u were in her town, then may be you would have had a good chance to make it through.

Is it the distance that is to be blamed who first WORKED FOR YOU to keep you excited in the relation to meet a person. After a few days as some time has passes away without you meeting her, it starts to WORK AGAINST YOU that you (or her) were not able to continue the magic of the relation. There are couples who stay in the same city but who hardly meet, but they still fall apart, then where does the parameter of distance come in...? I guess its all in the mind of the society who propogate this law.

i.e. Love is inversely proportional to the distance from your partner.

Had i been in the city as that girl, may be i would have made it through....Can i say that....????

I leave you to think about that....as I rest my case...!!!!

No-Vote Option

I was in conversation with one of my pals and we were discussing about how inflation has gone up and how people are reeling under it. Subsequently we then followed up with a talk on whom to vote this time next year when the new government will be formed. I was thinking to myself as to who should I vote next year. I try and read articles here and there often to answer this internal turmoil. I’m a responsible citizen (I know) or atleast I want my value to be proved to myself. I wonder whether the government in power is really effective or no. I tried to look back at its last 4 years in power and understood that in the penultimate year, the FM gave away all the wealth that he acquired for his government in the form of waivers, tax reductions, favors, etc. all in the name of “inclusive budget”. I then tried to re-collect similar happenings of the previous government too. Unfortunately I was not able to remember anything as I really did not pay attention then. Still my question is not answered as yet, “who should I vote for?”.

While having a chat with this pal we were also discussing about how the OBC quota verdict by the SC could be challenged by the dumb HRD minister of India. Then suddenly we changed our topic and started talking of IIMs and there by the competitive exams to get in. While discussing we spoke about the multiple choice questions that we get. And the various types of options. We spoke about the “none of the above” option also. Then we started drawing an analogy of having this option during voting too. Hmm, deep thought should be given to it, I thought to myself. We laughed it off. But, I kept thinking about the implications that it would have. On what basis will people choose the option and if they do then what does it mean. May be it means that this voter does not have the confidence to pick any one from the options available or may be he does not have the confidence in any of the previous governments. So in this case how will this “none of the above” option make this voter more responsible and what will happen if this “none of the above” wins the election. May be then we should have governments which do not join hands with friends for support (as they have been doing previously) but to go in a government which has foes together who will work united for the progress of the country. (Man..!!! I’m vicious..!) Or may be a situation where there is no opposition and all work unanimously for the country. I was thinking to myself, “Am I changing the face of democracy or what?” I just shrugged the thought off.

The heart of the whole matter is that I want to be a responsible citizen who wants an able government who could deliver something better than their predecessors. Who would let me enjoy the fruits of my effort in my working and social life, where there is mental peace that the government is not cheating me secretly in the name of “inclusive budget”.

FIN.

Happy Moment...!!!

Since a few days i am in a state of trance...literally...First Dj Tiesto entranced us with his type of music and then in a state of NIRVANA...Though I havent started doping yet but the feeling is awesome while being in a state such as it...The state of lowest energy. Yeah this is what people tell me when I ask them about meditation. The most scientific explaination of it. What is meditation. They tell me in a very simple way, suppose if you are standing in between two tracks from where u observe trains come and go on either side. You just observe and not react. That is how meditation works. They say we should avoid thinking while meditating, and just observe thoughts running in our mind. But not to delve in it more than what is required, I have been so calm and thoughtless that my mind has started to enjoying it. Avoiding stupid debates, conversations, INTROSPECTION, reviews. just living the moment. While doing it I am so happy that I am not even expecting more. This is a happy moment of the day for me. A moment that can really pep up my mood that will take me through a whole day happily. A happy moment is what is expected to be found in a day and then needs to be held on to and not get affected by any other depressing event/incident through out the day.
Reading a broach of "Happy Moment" I used to wonder it really meant. I now understand it always used to encourage these few moments in a day. Moments like encouragements from a boss (yeah thats on my mind constantly), mastee with friends, realizations, feeling great after work (only to get relieved from the 8 hour jail tenure). Its an experience which has kept me in a state which is unaffected from any hampering developments which may affect us if thought upon seriously. Its an experience which i wish is felt by all.

Hope this blog is a part of your Happy Moment...!

We dig into it...!!

It started about ten to twelve years ago when the mobile phone was introduced to the indian market...!!! Rs 16 per out going call and Rs 8 for the incoming...!! I still remember the day when I spoke for the first time on the bulky Motorola handset and I said mom "I am talking from a taxi..!!" That was one amazing day for me..(cmon i was a kid then..!) Then came college when we used to take calls only if the name flashed on the cell phone..!! waah woh bhi kya din the...!!! We used to sms free. Leading to an era of "the schemes" for the smses and the calls. Still in college i never had a phone but used to crave for one. Phir jab mere haath mein aaya phone toh used to go flashing it all around that i had the "smallest" (phone)...u perverts..!

"Karlo Duniya Muthi mein" era followed. Who would have thought that it will make me write this blog. Firstly pay for a phone that we could buy for a mere Rs 500. and then make calls at 40 paise. STD calls also were dirt cheap. Handsfree flooded the markets. My friends literally used every penny of it. Their phone bills kept soaring high. I kept juggling between the thought of having a post paid connection. Then repented after an aching bill was thrown in my face. I switched back to Pre-paid and took all possible schemes to save the money for a year.

Now, While staying in a place which is filled with young guns who have just tasted blood in large pay cheques, I wonder how and where do they spend so much of it. I dont have to look hard. i see people walk around talking to "somebody" on the phone. I am still walking and i realise that if we dont have anything to do we just pick up our phone and start yapping the night through with that special intrest or stupidly keep smsing the forwards. Spending anything between Rs 1000 to 1200 for a month is such a common phenomenon. Also,i see a special bunch. I am in my dear cafeteria and this guy is talking on the phone while his friends are shouting at him asking him to join them for dinner, but he is busy talking to someone. The whole thing is that people are so addicted to their mobile phones that they are ready to take all the abuse just to enjoy that happy moment with their "then" favorite person. Never realising how they are screwing up the other relationships. Bluetooth, radio, xMP camera, yGB space, touch screens is such a routine to hear that ppl are wanting more. These days everyone has been craving for a thing, a gizmo that will be found if lost by just being able to beep it. "Cant find it,then just buzz it yaar", will be a very common dialogue which i am expecting to hear very soon, for anything but your mobile, in the future. Weve forgotten a simple fact that we used to even survive when the mobile phones were not around, and still maintain the punctuality of meetings. With a mobile in hand everyone has got into such a laid back lifestyle that it has started ruining it all that it started for. A Facility not a Necessity. Addiction is dangerous and a mobile phone is definitely one more to the list....!!!!

Boomerang..!!

What does the word boomerang bring to your mind...First, i guess Mowgli....The dark lanky fellow wearing a skiny wrap around his waist and a boomerang which he plays with...!!! or may be a park where kids are having a blast with it...Well abt me when i think of it...I do also think on the same lines but sometimes I go a little far...May be in the direction as to how it returns back, its aerodynamics et al., or sometimes, what it reminds me repeatedly, on the philosophical side (haan bhai mere mein bhi ek philosopher hai..!!) that, stone once thrown cant be stopped or cant be controlled..!!! In other words, mistakes once done cant be rectified...!! Now, I consider a boomerang, that returns equally fast as it has been thrown, anything done in the past (gud or bad)will hit back upon me with the same effect on my life in the future...!!

What does this tell me? In our life, unfortunately, mistakes rebound. As they say, its a give and take relation with the universe and you or may be cause and effect, the past mistakes show their ugly face as consequences...!!! who wants to suffer..? i guess no one..!! then why do we suffer..? May be its because of the present that we are not in control of...or may be we are so tied up wth our past or the future that we forget the present. Time and again i am reminded of an old saying, "Present is the future of the past and the past of the future". In one sentence i was able to control the time. If i am able to do that then may be i will send in a boomerang which will hit back upon me in terms of help, or attention. Attention that is the most powerful need of today's world. Even in little quantity it brings in a lot of peace and happiness to a person. By mere humility, a smile brought upon by me on someone's face always pleases me...!!! It satisfies my soul deepening my faith in the Boomerang effect where i know something better is going to bounce back on me....SOON...!

ORKUT...ne meri le li...!!!

Yeah thats a true statement...ORKUT ne meri le li....Let me explain...!!! I joined orkut with a lot of resistance from a pal who was not willing to send in a request...Im talking abt times when ppl never knew what orkut was...!! Nevertheless..i joined and registered and started using orkut as a networking site rather than a dating site....If i meet a person online luck wud favor me most of the times...as the time passed by more and more ppl started knowing abt what it is and they registered too...!!! the point of the matter is, it reached such a state that finally all were on orkut...and the whole fun of going thro ppl's profiles started to diminish as more customisation options were now available. Thats where the trouble began....despite giving so much security to ppl various other issues cropped up...this is really gud...!!!

Girls would not want to be seen online with ppl whom they are kinda cozy about or may be guys wud not want to share space with girls who are a possible threat to them.....In a nutshell I was left alone with solo shots online...!!! Lag gayee meri..!!! KYON...coz ppl started saying I am self obsessed...!! LOL...I just kept thiking to myself "waah...re kismat...!!!".

Orkut should be used as a normal messaging site....not as a open forum..!! PPL did not realise that the USP was the "openess" of it...but nevertheless the more i shyed away from writing any private messages the more it bounced back on me...!!! some one told me "My bro or my frnd or my sis wud see these scraps..and may be start probing in...!" i thought to myself, why dont you simply press the delete button...LOL...!!!

But the best part was simply the fun i had on orkut...by literally being from one part of the world to another....!!! though i went thro some stupid conversations with regards to the useof orkut...And it gave me hell of a time with closed ones and almost landed me in trouble...i just luv being there....!!!!! Bolte hain na "ek baar sher ko khoon chataa do toh use phir sirf khoon hi chahiye..." i guess this saying aptly suits me...!!! lol..

Orkut Rocks...!!!!

Am I Jinxed....!!!

Me and my friends often talk about it.....Am i really jinxed...???? it really is funny...read on...!!! we sit in a cafeteria and I am discussing about a beautiful girl who is sitting right across my table...and I appreciate her beauty...and talk on endlessly about her and start cooking up things in my mind(simultaneously)...!!! And suddenly my friend walks in and says hi to this girl...!!! I feel all happy and anxious to ask for the details from this friend of mine...!!! The minute he sits down I start pestering him asking about her...!!! The frnd simply says dude....she is already been taken....I realise that damn im late again..!!!

Never mind...!!! I say to myself and I say.. may be next time I will have some one like her...!!!

I sit down at home and I feel like talking to an old friend from college...who is way too far from me in a city where I used to study (lets not think where I was studying...come back to blog plz)....!!! and I pick my phone and I ring heR....!!! I pass on the greetings and I get into the conversation..!!! and she gives me the big news....."dude..., im getting engaged...!!!" waah re meri kismat....she was the only one whom I used to hit upon during my college life....!!! (yaah i know its confession time)...!!!

I say to myself.....NEVER MIND...!!!

One more to drive my point home.....I was once supposed to visit a friend....but before that we have been cooking up all the stories abt me and her friend...!!! Imagine I havent even seen her and I am all ready to grab the package....I get all excited to meet her finally...!!! but destiny has its own time...I missed her as she was out on some work...!!! So patiently I take my pal out hoping that I wud see her once I drop my frnd back...!!! I drop my frnd home and there she was looking all pretty and happy to host us....main socha...meri toh nikal padee..!!!

But NEVER MIND..!!! She has been seeing a guy from her work place....!!!! And the guy was playing the last cards when I was there....!!!

So sit down again alone...its realisation time...I think to myself...!!! AM I JINXED....!!!!

Which ever girl I am looking upto as a prospective is either seeing some one or is abt to get married...and trust me these are just three out of the many instances where I was intercepted with the bad news...!!! lol...so I put on my thinking cap and start cooking in my mind a gud innocent story that may be if some girl is actually not having a guy in her life, she shud come to me, and refer to me as her only way out...."Pavan Baba, mujhe ek ladke se bhidda do...!!!!" main boloon "tathaastoo" and she returns with her Boyfriend the next week....!!!!

I dreamed out and said.....NEVER MIND....!!!

This is just a little funny story that me and my roomies laugh about when I discuss a "girl" whom i am meeting or talking to....They say dude...."kyon us ladki ki zindagi barbaad kar raha hai...abhi uski umar bhi nahin hui...usse door reh nahin toh uski bhi shaadi ho jaayegi....!!!"

I surely know..... I AM JINXED...!!!!

Sorry Dude you are late....!!!

I have a big fight with my pal. He tells me something to which i have no answer to.....I keep quiet I just don't reply as I dont have something to throw back. After the moment has passed away I sit down and realise that, Oh...!!! may be I cud have given this reply to that question...or may be I should have retaliated with a strong reply such as this..!!! But then the conscience in me tells me to calm down and slow down the negative thoughts. But in rage I want to reply and do something. So i just walk away from all for sometime so that I dont flush out my anger on someone. That is the time when i am surrounded and invited by more thoughts that provoke me to retaliate harder...and more lethal options are now available for it. I just try and calm myself. but then a thought of realisation creeps in SORRY DUDE YOU ARE LATE on retaliating and standing up for yourself. i can relate to this instance in every aspect of my life. In my life this place of this pal is taken by my boss, my best friend, my colleagues, my not so gud friends, sometimes parents too..!!!

It sometimes disheartens me that though i was able to come up with a gud answer or a gud reply or a gud fight back, the time has just slipped away from my hands...I have lost the chance and the opportunity to prove my worth at that moment when it was required the most. Thats the place and time when i realise that this is a point of change in me. I should be more spontaneous, more than that, spontaneous with desired results, comeback or for that matter a serious talk(with parents).
Mom used to say, "dont miss the bus", i never imagined that this saying wud actually show its ugly face in this manner, where i need to be quick and real. This is not just when i wanted to show my worth to others, it became necessary when i wanted to prove myself that i am worth a lot in this competitive and lethal world. Its a benchmark which i have to realise in this lifetime.
Hopefully in future i wud like myself to be saying the same dialogue that Kareena Kapoor said in the movie Jab We Met says " Thank You Babaji, aaj toh aapne mera record todne se bachaa liya, aaj toh train miss hi ho gayee thi".