Every year...that day...

Every year, on the last day of the year we resolute something to achieve which we havent got or achieved in the passing year. as the weeks pass by, situations change, our priorities change and so do our goals. Long forgoten are those vows made to our consicience. Misery follows guilt and it does not take long to realise that the new year is not really making us HAPPY. This is just abt the new years eve then come the days....Valentines day, Birthday, Friendship day and also the most enjoyable period of the year....the festival times which continue till the end of the year. Every year we have a different promise being made just like the last years that we shall achieve XYZ by the next year on the same day.



How many times do we do the above? what do we learn? With changing times we MAY or MAY NOT be able to do all the things on the TO-DO list. Why cant we do it? I wonder. Loneliness, laziness, no vigor, no/low risk in life are the few of the many excuses that come to my mind as an answer to that question.



Whats the solution? By the time we realise that we are trouble, we have already lost the time and opportunity. So in reality, it is about being available in the present moment and finishing off all those things which can be procrastinated. By doing this half the troubles are reduced, success is met more often and definitely happiness stays around.

Achieving all those things before that day returns next year makes comes with enormous amount of experience. The struggle to achieve the goal leaves us more richer with experience of living life, if not moolah.

Live the real life by striving to achieve those goals to gain the experience, coz after all it is what makes our life more richer. Lets not renew the vows, rather lets make new ones as the old ones have already been crossed out by that day every year.

Feel....in....G.....!!!!

Yeah....read it that way....and it sounds cheezy.....im not saying that it does not sound cheezy if read out at once either....!! why is it that people are so scared to express about what they feel. Is it so hard to accept that people have feelings....as if a human being a creature who cannot have emotions....! Its these emotions and the responses towards these emotions that make us different from animals...

What are emotions or feelings? Its just a mental state where we want do what we want to do, and be the reak us instead of holding ourselves back and being someone else which we are not (atleast on some occasions)

I was wondering why should we think so much before doing something that our heart wants to do....Why should we hold on for a couple of more days before we call someone SPECIAL or IMPORTANT thinking that its too early to call. Or thinking that its important to space out between the calls. Why should we not talk crap when we return home and be less sober and serious as we are at work. why cant we just be us. Even if it is STUPID, dumb us...!!!! At the end of the day that is what we want. To enjoy ourselves and FEEL happy. Why is it so difficult to understand that even a grown up person wants it this way........ like the days of childhood when everything was uninhibited....atleast the feelings. Emotions bring out the real person and connects us with the innocent us.

Feelings are abstract. These cant be seen, then how in the world can someone understand them until we speak about them. Then why shouldnt we speak and talk about how we feel. Its DEFINITELY not a sign of being weak. Its just a medium to tell others whats on our mind.

So I believe if we ever got bogged down by the PRATICAL us, we just know what we should be FEEL...IN...G or doing.

Everbody has their day...!

I go out partying at my second home at 10D on thursdays (most of them) and i meet my pals and enjoy the karaoke....I come across pals who are with some great company (if u know what i mean) or some old pals....and sometimes with none...!! There have been times when i have gone and done the superficial hi hello and then just enjoyed the karaoke...! And i used to keep looking at others who were with a great group enjoying their time...and i kept wondering when would i get such a chance....! Then, one day i was with my pal from mumbai and my cousins enjoying a gala time at 10D....and i see this same friend who was sittting there quietly drinking his poison....enjoying the hustle bustle around him....Suddenly out of no where a thought struck that is it really happening that he is all by himself today and he does not have the same company which stood by him for the last 2 to 3 weeks on every thursday enjoying the karaoke with him....? The fact was that it was happening to him by the minute...! I realised that its not just me who goes through this cycle of solitude, rejection, isolation and dejection and sinkin in the ocean of pain.....................BOY......did i feel better or wat suudenly.....I felt relieved (The satan grin was there) that i was not alone....! I had someone to share the burden that even he could be made to live an evening by himself even if he is a jolly good fellow.....Every dog has its day.....!!!!

When men meet they turn into boys...!

Its true...!!! When men meet they turn into boys....why wouldnt they...? They dont have any bondages when they are out to have fun.....Outside or Inside of their homes they just want to enjoy, revel and live in the moment. A couple of days, i was watching a program where three big wigs of the bollywood were on a game show and it being hosted by one of them. They knew each other for years and were just trying to have a blast ....something like a re-union, where they shared their secrets publically on national television. The point is that they were hardly bothered when either of them were talkling about their personal issues, some really personal. But hugging and laughing their ass off just kept going on....enjoying the old days of their revelery when they were young....
So women get out of our way....dont stop us now when we want to just enjoy the Guys' style...an invitation is being given out, "Mehfil jamegi Jab mil baithenge kuch yaar.....aap....mein....aur humara....Bagpiper...!!!"

Headache is a pain...Its true....!

I used to always wonder why people suffer from imsonia. I finally understood what is insomnia today. Although i am far from being insomniac, spells of discomforted sleep yesterday, which are as good as insomniac experiences, are making me write this blog.

All of this happened yesterday. I was not able to sleep all night. The temperature of the city added fuel to my discomfort. Moving from one room to another to find some peace, i remained awake all through the night. Thoughts of me passing out kept kept coming back to me. Were these the signs of a heat stroke. I did not know. I kept wondering. In the mean while i kept hydrating myself. In the last two days, i was out all day giving no rest to my body. This took a toll on me. I suffered from a severe headache today morning. I intimated my boss of my absence in the office and slept through. i had survived the scare of dying. I had passed one scary night.

I know that i am making a little big deal of it. But this had never happened, ever, to such a level. After waking up i was still dizzy with light pain lingering on my head. I took a pain killer and decided to rest more. But before that i exchanged my bro's number (In Case of Emergency number, ICE) with my roomie and slept again. Imagine what i must be going through to exchange such a number, suddenly. He repeatedly kept asking why i was doing so. I kept settling down the whole discussion by just avoiding it.

Through the whole day i kept wondering what was bothering me so much that i was attacked by so much pain. Was it the work pressure at office, the boss's expectations of me or my own expectations to perform better. I guessed it to be all. Apart from these, the studies are looming large in my face. The pressure of short preparation time before the exam has started to show its ugly face on my health. All this made me realise what my dad used to tell me when i was young. That is to rest as much as i could and not abuse the body. Eat healthy and stay fit.

I have understood this advice thoroughly and made up my mind to rest periodically and not abuse my body to this great extent and take up some physical exercise to keep up with the stress levels at work.

Learners - 25.02.09

I used to always wonder that how can people have the enthusiasm and the patience to read an already read book again. but today out of no where i realised that it is worth an another read. Why you may think. The reason being Evolution. Yes...! Evolution is a phrase used when we know that we have grown for the better. Our perspectives have changed. Our views have broadened. We can see issues in a much different light today unlike past. The experience and knowledge are the key words here. They make an old, difficult issue look easy today. Its like Maths of the yesteryears that looks so easy today, as against those times when we used to struggle with it.

Coming back to the story of the Re-reading of a book/ article. We read the same passage of the book, but this time with a different perspective and mind set. May be we are on the opposite side of the thought process as against the last time when we read this same passage giving different meaning. Re-reading refreshes the old topic but this time it brings with t isome new realisation. Realisations hit us everytime when we read the same page over and over again. Today that topic sounds familiar and easy to deal with and tomorrow it may look elementary. We can relate to it much better now. Thats the power of experience and knowledge. The present circumstances also drive the thought process. For example, reading the daily horoscope at the start of the day and and at the end of the day. Same paragraph could be given different meaning. Sometimes opposite too. We may think that were we that stupid that we were not able to understand such a trivial point? We could have saved some much time and energy if we would have understood this point then. But hey, thats the fun of life. We grow from our old selves and evolve to live a cheerful future.

Now, the question is, are you gonna re-read your old book to be more wiser than yesterday...?

Thumb rule....!

What do u think is true for friendship that is also true for love? We all know for a fact that friendship sows the seed of love. I clearly have one rule in my mind which i have followed since childhood. "if the girl likes u in one go for something then she will like u no matter what u do ( even if u have pissed her off for something). And if she does not like you in the first go then, no matter how hard anyone tries she will not like u.... "

It is important to see whether the girl has an inclination towards the conversation u make with her. If the input is flowing from just one side then the relation MAY not grow for long. I had thoroughly understood this when I apporached my puberty. So i used to always let go off women who were not showing any interest in me or my conversations, despite i having a soft corner for them.
Conversely, there were loads of instances where i never used to let go off a FRIEND even after i had understood that the lady is showing the least of interest in me or my conversations. i kept pursuing the relation. I was just wanting friendship. Nothing more. Why cant women just be friends and not think beyond. I started getting unhappy despite knowing very well that i had done nothing to spoil the relation. Then why was i subjected to such a treatment? Today, after so many years have passed by, Eureka moment arrived. The rule of thumb that i used to follow for LOVE should have also been followed for FRIENDSHIP too...may be thn i wud have felt less hurt. It was useless pursuing women who were just trying to waste time for the heck of it and making myself unhappy thinking things would improve. Instead its now easier to let go off such people.

It may be hard in the beginning (thats what i realise) but once in the gear, i am sure it will be a smooth ride. Its better to invest myself in a place where i feel happy rather than pursue people who are dis-inteterested in me (as such wthout knowing the real intentions of me).